A person was lost.
He was in turmoil, on trial, looking at a prison sentence.
He was also loved.
We had a barbecue the day before and I now know, he said goodbye.
To our little cousins, to me, to the world.
I went to bed, in a state of calmness because of this.
The next day, Memorial Day, everything changed.
He was gone.
Energy had shifted in real time.
It was the worst day I’ve ever known. The worst I hope to know.
On Memorial Day, so many years ago, the news was broken.
My parents were broken.
I was broken.
Officers came to my door, they showed a picture of my brothers dead face to my mom and dad.
They recognized him. My dad screamed. My mom felt unspeakable things.
But, that evening, there was a mocking bird. Singing a beautiful song. As we sat in our living room. Holding hands.
Nothing could’ve changed our devastation but that birds song helped.
It was as if he was there. In a different form. Comforting us.
It was mesmerizing. Uplifting.
I believe it was him.
Letting us know, “I’m okay now”. “Don’t worry”.
That night I had a dream.
He was in our house.
He came to me and said, “let mom know her chicken was the best. Be there for her.”
He turned to go back downstairs,where his room was.
He stopped and looked at me.
As a twin, he didn’t need to put anything into words.
I knew what he meant.
He’d be there for the next few weeks.
He’d be there to watch over us.
He’d be there when any of us crossed over.
Memorial Day is to remember those who’ve been in service of the greater good.
In our little family, we remember him. All the times he made us laugh. All the times we celebrated his accomplishments. All the times we spent with him.
I don’t fear death, only dying. But I believe in that moment he will be the one to take me to wherever we’re going.
And I will be so happy to see him again.