She was in the elevator….. she regretted her decision immediately.￼
He wanted sex.
She couldn’t give him that.
He might just take it.
It would be be understandable if he just took it.
She hadn’t thought this thorough.
She braced herself for anything. If anything, she’d have empty sex and it would last till the next train.
She’d leave her body. In terror.
But she would come back. At least a part of her would come back.
The part that felt nothing. The part dissociated with the deepest part of herself.
She reached his floor.
The elevator opened.
Part of herself had already left the building.
There she was, at his door.
She knocked again.
The door opened.
His eyes were kind. And deep.
Maybe he was like she thought. It would be rare.
She remembered her last boyfriend. He held a knife to her throat.
“I didn’t think you’d come”.
Her subconsciousness took on a life of its own.
“Is this okay?”
He opened the door wide.
“Of course. Come in.”
It was a suite. He had money. Or someone did and was paying for it.
“Are you hungry?”
He seemed sincere. She didn’t have a concrete reason not to trust him. If there was doubt it was her, not him.
She dropped her bag on the loveseat and turned to face him.
She was disarmed.
“I’m good. Unless you were going to order food…”
He sat down on the loveseat.
“Nah, I’m good. I was hoping you’d come.”
There was a desk with a chair toward the back of the room.
“Remember what we talked about?”
She walked over to the desk and moved the chair backwards and sat down.
“Yes. It’s interesting. I’ve never thought about that before.”
She gripped the middle of the chair with her hands and widened her legs.
“What do you think?” she asked
“It’s up to you.” he said
She got up and stood in front of him.
He turned to face her.
“Put your hands back.”
He extended his hands on the back of the loveseat, palms out.
She took her shirt off to reveal a black lace bra.
“I can’t have sex with you. But I think I can pleasure you.”
She unbuttoned her jeans.
“Remember what I said. I can leave my body at anytime.”
He was relaxed as she slipped out of her jeans.